


Sex, Alley Beatings, and "Te Amo, Mi Amor"

by postinghumorouslyposthumously



Series: Chillin' On a Building [3]
Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Anal Sex, Fluff, Love, M/M, OMC - Freeform, POV Wade Wilson, Slipknot should probably be tagged, Smut, Wade Centric, random ginger gets beat up and buys Wade pancakes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-12
Updated: 2018-04-12
Packaged: 2019-04-21 19:26:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14291790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/postinghumorouslyposthumously/pseuds/postinghumorouslyposthumously
Summary: Wade has an accidental mini-adventure no suit involved, and saves a ginger. Peter makes a confession. Sometimes relationships make us better people. Sometimes they beat the shit out of us in alley's.This chapter is sponsored by Mel's Wings. Best pancakes in the world!-Part III!





	Sex, Alley Beatings, and "Te Amo, Mi Amor"

**Author's Note:**

> Well, here's the third installment. This takes place after the second installment. Probably...idk, a couple months. Just a short little thing I wrote because why not. Semi-edited.

_ Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll would be the perfect title for this chapter.  _

Wade thought as he stared up at Peter’s red, sweaty face above him. He rocked frantically on Wade’s cock, nails digging in to his chest. Slipknot played loudly in the background from the portable speaker connected to Peter’s phone. 

Wade savored the look on Peter’s face when he came. Mouth hanging open, eyes shut tight, small noise eliciting from his throat. Wade was right behind him. 

Ever come with Corey Taylor screaming his lungs out in the background?

Peter collapsed on top of him after, taking a moment to lift himself off Wade’s cock. Wade’s hands slid from Peter’s waist, to his back. He grinned in blissed-out afterglow. 

“Well damn, Petey, we need to do this more often,” he said, slightly out of breath. Peter said nothing, just moved his hand under the nape of Wade’s neck. He pushed himself up slightly, enough to cup Wade’s cheek with his other hand and kiss him. 

Wade responded it with a tiny moan. After a moment or two, Peter let himself collapse again with his cheek against Wade’s. 

“I should probably go,” Peter mumbled into the crook of Wade’s neck. Wade brushed his hand over Peter’s back. 

“Spidey thing or boring thing?” 

Peter snorted as he lifted up onto his hands and knees, climbing off Wade. 

“Aunt May thing,” Peter said once his feet were on the floor. He looked around, then picked up a towel from the floor and cleaned himself off before tossing the towel to Wade to do the same. 

Wade raised an eyebrow, 

“Needs help getting the viruses off her computer from downloading busty lesbian porn?” He asked. Peter rolled his eyes, pulling his underwear up. 

“You’re confusing her with you, Wade.” 

Wade grinned, 

“Ah, right.” 

Peter picked up his jeans and shirt, and headed towards the bathroom. Wade flung the soiled towel off the bed, and put his hands behind his head, letting his eyes fall closed as he heard Peter run the shower. 

 

_ The city that never slept sure could use a nap.  _

Wade thought as he walked down the street, cap and hood pulled up, head down to conceal his face.  _ Conseal  _ is a much better word than  _ hide _ . 

Initially, he had been going to get pizza from  _ Amelia’s Pizza Joint _ down the street from his apartment, but he had been sorely disappointed to find they were closed due to a shooting. Amelia’s twelve year old daughter shot some bastard who was trying to rob the place. Wade made sure to give the girl a thumbs up when he saw her being questioned by the police through the window as the M.E.’s rolled the body bag past. 

Sounds of depraved debauchery were the soundtrack tonight. He stopped short next to an alley when he heard a shout coming from it’s dark depths. Wade cocked his head, trying to determine if the shout was that of someone being mugged, or a schizophrenic homeless person. 

Another shout, voice cracking in the middle of it, sounding a lot like the word  _ help _ . 

Wade turned, and walked down the alley, hands in his jacket pockets. He scanned the area as he walked, and then came upon a little pocket of space between two buildings to his right, where a kid was getting the shit beat out of him. 

Wade tilted his head. Two guys, ganging up on a smaller teenage boy with bright orange hair. One of the bigger guys held the boy by the back of his shirt down on his knees. Blood poured out of the teenage boy’s nose. He had his hands up towards the other guy that wasn’t holding him, the one who seemed to be in charge. 

“Please-!” The boy exclaimed as the guy lunged to hit him again. 

“ _ Hey!”  _ Wade shouted, nice and commanding. All three of them whipped their heads around to look at him. He flashed a grin. “Move along, now,” he said. All three of them eyed him up. The man holding the kid up scoffed. 

Wade pulled a gun out of his waistband. 

“‘Said move along, cuntlickers,” Wade said, pointing the gun at them with the safety off, finger on the trigger. The man holding the kid looked panicked. His eyes flashed over to the other man, who had gone rigid, but was trying to pretend like he was cool. 

The man who was obviously in charge-probably nothing more than a random thug by the looks of it-just scoffed, shrugging. He glanced down at the kid, who looked up at him. Something weird seemed to pass between them. 

“Not worth it,” the guy said in a thick accent, shoving his hands in his pockets and brushing past. Wade and the man’s eyes met as he passed him. He was quite a bit shorter. He glared. Wade winked. 

“Scamper off.” 

He paused right next to Wade, fists clenched at his sides looking like he was about to take a swing. Then he glanced at the gun, and made probably one of the only good decisions of his life. He walked off with a shake of his shoulders, like he was shrugging off the homicidal rage. 

The other man quickly let go of the kid, who fell on his hands. The man followed the other quickly. Wade waited, and watched as they disappeared around the corner of the alley before stowing his gun away and taking a step towards the kid. 

He sat on the pavement, hand up by his face, holding his bloody nose. Wade offered him a hand down. The kid only stared at his scars for a second before taking the offered appendage, using it to help himself up with a wince. 

“Lose a bet?” Wade asked, taking his hand back and shoving it in his hoodie pocket as soon as the kid was on his own two feet. He just looked at him. He was tall, almost as tall as Wade. Hair like fire, and freckles covering his face. 

“Thanks,” he said, eyes averting obviously from Wade’s face. Probably trying to be polite to the guy who just saved his ass from a serious kicking. Wade shrugged. 

“Well, ya know, bae wants me to be a better person,” he said animatedly, watching as at first the kid just stared at him again, and then scoffed amusedly. His eyes trailed over the pavement where some of his blood stained it red. He wiped his bloody face with his sleeve. 

“Right, so...can cross that act of good samaritanism off my checklist for today,” Wade said, and turned on his heel toward the opening to the alley. 

“W-wait.” 

He heard the kid say behind him as he walked off. Wade turned his head to glance at him as the boy walked quickly to catch up with him, pressing a hand to his side as he did. 

“Ye-es?” Wade asked. 

“Who the fuck are you?” He asked, although not rudely. Wade just grinned, dropping his gaze low as they stepped out of the alley and back onto the sidewalk. 

“Wade,” he said simply. 

“I’m Cayden.” 

“I’m hungry,” Wade said in response, lifting his head to look around, “my usual pizza joint is closed d’day, and every other place around here that sells pizza tastes like dirty testicles.” 

The kid, Cayden, snorted. 

“Does it have to be pizza?” He asked. Wade glanced sideways at him. 

“Why?” 

Cayden shrugged, then grimaced, putting his hand to his side again briefly. 

“There’s this place called Mel’s Wings that has really good pancakes.” 

Wade cocked his head to the side in thought, “ _ hmm _ ”ing contemplatively. Then he grinned. 

“Sounds like my kinda place.” 

 

Mel’s Wings  _ did  _ have really good pancakes. Which was surprising, but, hey...stranger things, right? 

“So…” Wade said conversationally as he chewed a large bite of pancake. “Why were those guys beating the shit out of you?” He asked casually.

Cayden put his fork down, and shifted uncomfortably. Wade gestured with his fork, syrup-slathered piece of pancake flinging syrup on the table.

“Hey, listen, I don’t really give a fuck either way, but I find pancakes to be a very conversational food. If you don’t make conversation while eating pancakes at eight P.M., it’s just depressing.” Wade said, and shoved the bite of pancake in his mouth. Cayden looked up at him, lips quirked up slightly in a hint of a smile. It fell after a second. 

“So, what?” Wade asked, “Owe ‘em money?” 

Cayden shook his head. 

“Nah, uh…It’s complicated.” 

Wade half-shrugged. 

“Always fuckin’ is. You know what’s not complicated? Shoving a gun in someone’s face. That makes things  _ super  _ simple.” 

Cayden just stared at his plate. Wade chewed, and watched him.

“...That wasn’t a threat by the way,” he added. Cayden chortled. 

“...The um...the shorter one? That’s was Edan,” he said, “he’s...well we...I...I don’t really know what to call it, but we screw.” 

Wade took a sip of his coke. Cayden glanced up at him, then scoffed slightly. 

“Guess I should say we  _ used  _ to screw.” 

Wade shrugged his shoulders. 

“What’d you do?” Wade asked after a minute had passed. Cayden sighed, then gave a despondent shrug. 

“Fucked him over.” 

“You deserve the ass kicking?” Wade asked, and then took another bite of pancake. Cayden looked up again. He was silent for a few moments. 

“Guess it depends on your perspective.” 

“What’s  _ your  _ perspective?” He said, mouth still full, words slightly distorted. Cayden stared at him. For a second, it was like he couldn’t even see Wade’s scars. He just looked right into Wade’s eyes. Nobody ever did that ‘cept Peter. 

“Probably,” he said and looked down. 

Wade nodded. Cayden laughed slightly. 

“Yeah, I probably had it comin’.” 

This time, Wade shrugged. 

“Eh, we all deserve to get the shit beat out of us sometimes,” Wade went to take another bite of pancake as Cayden nodded in agreement, then he paused in thought. “‘Cept Peter,” he continued eating. 

Cayden glanced at him. 

“Who’s Peter?” 

Wade grinned slightly. 

“Booty call.” 

At that precise moment, Wade’s phone started buzzing. Wade cursed, and dropped his fork, then dug his phone out of his pocket. He laughed when he saw the name on the screen, and showed it to Cayden briefly. 

“See?” He said as he answered. Cayden laughed. 

“Hell-O?” Wade said into the phone. 

“ _ Wade? Hey, where the fuck are you?”  _

Wade turned to stare at the counter of Mel’s Wings, watching as an old couple ordered some nachos. 

“I’m at Mel’s Wings eating pancakes.” 

“ _ Why are you eating pancakes at a place called Mel’s Wings? And I thought you said you’d have pizza for when I came home.”  _

“Because they don’t sell waffles?” Wade answered in a “duh” tone, “and Amelia’s is closed. Her kid shot some guy, so the place is wrapped up in pretty, reused yellow tape.” 

“ _ O...kay.”  _ Peter replied. 

“I’ll bring you some nachos back,” Wade said, mouth watering at the sight of the paper basket of cheesy nachos the old couple was given. Peter snorted on the other line. 

“ _ And eat most of them?”  _

“Nah, baby,  _ all  _ of them.” 

“‘ _ Kay, whatever...be home soon, I’m leaving for patrol in like an hour.”  _

“M‘kay.” 

“ _...I love you, Wade.”  _

Wade froze. Mel’s Wings froze. The universe froze. Somewhere, Stan Lee was orgasming. 

“...M’kay.” 

Wade quickly hung up and shoved the phone back into his pocket along with all his  _ feelie-weelies,  _ and turned back to his plate of pancakes, which only had one pancake left. He hurriedly shoveled the whole thing in his mouth, and poured some syrup in after. When he was finished, and had chugged some coke, he looked up to find Cayden staring at him. 

“What?” Wade asked, licking his teeth.

Cayden shrugged and looked away. 

 

Cayden pulled out a pack of cigarettes as they walked outside, and a lighter. He paused for a moment, and Wade paused with him, to-go bag by his side. 

Cayden blew out a stream of smoke and looked like he was ejaculating with the exhale, and then turned to Wade. 

“...Thanks, again.” He said, expression serious and slightly dejected. Wade shrugged. 

“Eh, like I said...I like pulling guns on people.” 

Cayden laughed, and looked at him strangely. Then he lifted his hand and waved once. 

“See you later, I guess.” 

“Next time you’re getting your ass handed to you in a back alley,” Wade said. Cayden chuckled. 

“See you soon _ ,  _ then.” 

Wade just grinned. 

“Peace, love, and drugs, Cayden!” Wade said with a two-finger salute before turning on his heel and walking the opposite direction. 

 

_ “...I love you, Wade.”  _

Wade kicked an empty cup out onto the street as he walked. They’d been together for...what? Nine months? Ten? I mean, yeah, that was longer than Wade had ever been with anyone, but...was that the proper amount of time before telling some you L-O-V-Ed them? Was Peter pregnant?  _ This isn’t a fucking Mpreg, is it?  _

He was a little slower going up the steps of his apartment building. Stopped to eavesdrop on the neighbor couple having a fight. Brian apparently fucked Kiara’s friend Jackie, but they were like,  _ totally  _ fucked up, so it didn’t really count. Jackie apparently looks a lot like Kiara. But,  _ ooh shit,  _ Kiara’s black and Jackie’s Latina. What the fuck, Brian? She should kick you out on your dumb ass. Wade said a silent prayer for Brian’s soul, and walked past Kiara and Brian’s door to his own. 

He went directly to the kitchen and set the nachos on the counter. Then looked up towards the living room. Peter was sitting on the couch. He looked over his shoulder at Wade. 

They stared at each other. Wade moved towards the living room, hands in his jacket pockets. 

“Hey,” Peter said. 

“Hey,” Wade replied. Peter licked his lips, and then looked away. He scratched his neck. 

Wade stepped forward, and fell onto the couch, slumping down into it. 

“Nachos are in the kitchen,” he said. Peter nodded. 

“...Mel’s is a really great place, great atmosphere. I overheard two tenth graders in the booth behind us say where they could score some blow for a great price.”   
Peter snorted. 

“Oh, also, I  _ totally  _ saved this kid’s ass in an alley. He was getting the crap beat out of him. Lover’s quarrel with third person party or something. He’s the one who bought me pancakes.” 

Peter opened his mouth. Closed it again. Grinned slightly. Made an amused sound, then let his head drop back into the cushions. 

“Good,” was all he said, rolling his head to the side to look at Wade with hooded eyes. Wade stared back at him. Peter’s eyes trailed over his half-hidden face. “Take the hood off.” 

Wade did as he was told, tossing the hat across the room. It sailed behind the TV. Neither of them glanced at it. Peter lifted his hand and pressed his thumb lightly against Wade’s lower lip, other fingers resting under his jaw. 

“Probably should have waited to say that,” Peter said quietly. Wade didn’t say anything; he knew what Peter was talking about. Peter trailed his hand up to caress Wade’s cheek. Wade reached up and grabbed Peter’s hand, then kissed his palm. 

“I’m not not in love with you, too,” he said into his palm. Peter smiled. He pulled his hand away, and slapped Wade’s knee playfully. 

“Nachos,” he said, and got up to retrieve them from the kitchen. 

Wade looked up at the ceiling and grinned, then closed his eyes.

“ _ Nachos! _ ” He bellowed, keeping his eyes closed. 

“Nachos!” Peter repeated, running back into the living room with the nachos, and jumping into Wade’s lap. 

 

They groaned, and they moaned, and Wade took it up the ass as Peter held him down. No music tonight, just the sounds of labored breathing and occasional breathy cursing as Peter rammed Wade’s prostate. 

Best part of his day, no fucking contest. And, if there  _ was  _ a fucking contest, they would  _ definitely  _ win. No points deducted for appearances. 

Wade’s soul died a little when he came. 

 

They laid out on their backs after cleaning up.  _ Such  _ a chore. Who the fuck wants to clean up after having your brains fucked out? No one. 

Their joined hands laid on the bed by their sides. 

“I think this is the most silent you’ve ever been after sex,” Peter said, laughing slightly and giving Wade’s hand a squeeze. Wade squeezed back, and closed his eyes. 

“I’m  _ basking _ over here, Peter,” he said. 

He felt Peter shift onto his side, then his hand on Wade’s chest. Wade opened his eyes. 

“Love you,” he said. 

Wade’s mouth quirked up, and he craned his neck up. Peter leaned down and pressed his mouth to Wade’s. Wade slipped his tongue into Peter’s mouth briefly before he pulled away. 

“Love you, too.” 

Peter smirked, and leaned down again, pressing into Wade’s side, cheek against Wade’s, head buried in the pillow. 

“You’re my baby daddy.” 

Peter laughed. Wade grabbed at his side, tickling him, and Peter laughed more before pushing him off. 

“Dick,” Peter said, still smiling, and fell onto his back again. His side pressed against Wade’s. Shoulder to knee. Wade crossed his ankle over Peter’s. Peter pulled his away, and crossed it back over Wade’s so that his was on top.

“ _ Mmm, _ but you love me though, so I win,” Wade said in response. 

Peter smiled.

“Yup.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly, I had no idea how to end this, so I just kinda ended it. Maybe I'll have a future one-shot where Wade freaks out over the idea of Peter loving him, because that's totally something he would do. Alright, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control are not good words to live by on a Friday night.


End file.
